Bad Things Always Seem To Come With The Good

Yesterday I was so very happy. My first daughter's mother said that I can send gifts to our daughter directly now that she is older.....of course this brought excitement and happiness within myself. I told my fiance, Durand, and he said to me "you say you don't regret your decision, if she asks you if you regret it would you tell her the same?" I told him that of course I would tell her that I don't regret it, he then went on to tell me how selfish I am because what if saying that hurts her. Him saying that to me hurt me, and this is why this journey has been so hard. It has been so hard because when I get close to people and talk to them about Ash's adoption they hold on to that to hurt me because they know it is a sore spot for me. Why would people do that? This is how I feel, I do not or ever have regretted my decision, I have thought twice about if I did the right thing or not but I have NEVER REGRETED IT. I love my daughter and I believe in my heart that she knows that and will always knnow that. I believe that her mother has shared with her enough that my love is seen. Why is it that because it is a painful choice people think it is a bad choice or a regretful choice. I guess I should have said back to him "I don't regret giving her life, now if I would have taken her life away then I would have regret." Maybe then it would be better understood. So with my excitement there came pain. If you love me then be here for me, don't hurt me with a past that continues to hurt more then most can even start to understand.